Reaching your goals in midlife isn’t just about wanting change; it’s about committing to it. Whether it’s losing weight, paying off debt, traveling more, building new friendships, or starting a new business, the key is not just setting the goal but being unwaveringly committed to reaching it. Let’s dive into how you can transform your midlife dreams into reality by embracing grit, self-trust, and a no-excuses attitude.
Here’s the hard truth: wanting a goal is easy; committing to it is hard. It requires grit—unshakable determination to persevere, even when things get uncomfortable. In midlife, achieving goals takes more than desire; it takes deliberate action, self-awareness, and resilience.
• Know who you are: Trust yourself and validate your desires. Being committed starts with being someone who believes in their worth.
• Ditch the excuses: Excuses don’t get results; actions do.
• Get comfortable with discomfort: Growth doesn’t happen in the comfort zone. Be willing to face the hard stuff.
By midlife, you’ve likely experienced your share of frustrations with goal-setting. You might wonder why it feels more complicated now than in your 20s or 30s. Studies show that adults over 40 are less likely to pursue long-term goals because of decreased confidence in their ability to succeed (Heckhausen, Wrosch, & Schulz, 2010). But here’s the good news: confidence grows through action, not vice versa.
We often quit on our goals because we:
• Want instant results and get discouraged when progress is slow.
• Let self-doubt creep in and believe those negative thoughts.
• Stay committed to comfort rather than to growth.
But here’s a mindset shift: be more committed to self-love than self-doubt.
Reinventing yourself in midlife requires a clear vision, laser focus, and ruthless commitment. Ask yourself:
1. What do I want?
2. Why do I want it?
3. Am I willing to do whatever it takes to get it?
4. Do I trust myself to follow through?
Clarity is power. Write down your goal every single day. Check in with yourself each night. Reflect on your progress. Writing your goals improves your chances of success by 42% (Matthews, 2015). Why? Because it keeps your focus sharp and your commitment alive.
Here’s how to move from wanting to doing:
1. Treat Your Goal Like a Newborn Baby
Your goal needs your undivided attention. As a newborn demands care, energy, and patience, so does your dream. You can’t neglect it for a single day.
2. Show Up Like Your Future Self
Visualize the woman who has already achieved the goal. How does she think, act, and make decisions? Start embodying her today.
3. Build a No-Excuses Routine
Success is built on habits. Every single day, no matter what, take action toward your goal. No excuses. No complaints. This consistency builds trust in yourself.
4. Prioritize Effort Over Perfection
You don’t have to get it right every time. You just have to keep going. Progress over perfection is the name of the game.
5. Hire Help If Needed
Investing in a life coach or mentor can accelerate your progress. Coaches help you identify blind spots, break self-doubt, and stay accountable. Research shows that coaching improves goal achievement rates by up to 80% (Grant, 2014).
Let me share a personal example. I don’t leap out of bed thrilled to go to the gym at 5 a.m. But I do it because I love the results—a more substantial body, a clearer mind, and a more profound sense of self-trust. Every gym session is a deposit into my confidence bank. And guess what? Those deposits add up.
If you could achieve one goal right now, what would it be? Ask yourself:
• How badly do I want it?
• Am I willing to be obsessed with it?
• Will I prioritize it over everything else?
Your goal should feel like the most important thing you’ve ever done. That level of focus changes everything.
Once you achieve one goal, it creates momentum. The joy and energy from reaching that milestone fuel your desire to tackle the next one. Success is addictive—and it’s contagious.
To reach your goals in midlife:
1. Decide what you want.
2. Commit like your life depends on it.
3. Take daily action, no matter how small.
4. Celebrate every victory.
Remember, you’re not just achieving goals but reinventing your life. Be the woman of your dreams—she’s already inside you, waiting for you to commit.
Midlife is the perfect time to redefine yourself and what you want. Your dreams are valid, your goals are worth the effort, and your future self will thank you for the grit and love you invest today.
Reinvent your life, show up for yourself, and be obsessed with your goals. The best version of you is just one commitment away.
Love, Jax
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References:
• Heckhausen, J., Wrosch, C., & Schulz, R. (2010). A motivational theory of life-span development. Psychological Review, 117(1), 32–60.
• Matthews, G. (2015). GoalsResearch: How does writing them down make you more likely to succeed?
• Grant, A. M. (2014). The efficacy of executive coaching in times of organizational change. Journal of Change Management, 14(2), 258-280.
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